Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Super Bowl ads on a shoestring

In my post about the Super Bowl, I erroneously stated that a 30 second commercial for this years match was costing advertisers $30 million. It actually only costs $3 million. Considering that, I think I'll take two.

Miller High Life has decided that even without that extra zero, a 30 second Super Bowl spot is still over priced. At least that's the idea behind their commercial this year. Instead of coughing up $3 million for a full 30 seconds, they decided that 1 second is all they need.

Caveat Emptor

If you've been paying attention lately, you'll have noticed that a lot of items at the store are shrinking. For instance, most cartons of ice cream aren't a half gallon anymore, they're only 1.75 quarts. From what I hear, Jimmy Dean sausage rolls have also gotten smaller (Warning: clip is hilarious, but the language gets pretty colorful towards the end). Companies do this because more people remember how much an items costs vs. the exactly quantity that's in it. So people are happy that the price is the same without realizing that they're not getting what they used to be getting In the end though, the quantity is right there on the package, and it's up to the consumer to be aware of what they're buying.

In some cases though, things aren't so simple. Take fountain drinks, for instance. Everywhere I've ever bought a fountain drink offers sizes like "small", "medium", and "large". I don't have evidence to back this up, but it seems like a "large" coke isn't as large as it used to be. Not that I'm advocating that we all be drinking copious amounts of coke at any given meal, I just think think it would be a great benefit to the consumer if companies were required to advertise cup volume rather than arbitrary size name. After digging on their websites, I found out that the cup sizes are relatively consistant at McDonald's and Sonic, but Burger King cups are much bigger per size. However, you'd never know this from lookig at their menu boards. (Note to self: make cup size conversion chart to ensure proper ordering between restaurants).

Even if restaurants were required to advertise their cup sizes, there is still going to be a discrepancy in quantity of drink based on the amount of ice in the cup, but at least we'd have something definitive to judge by. And while I'm on this subject, I would love to know how much time is put into determining what ice shape and straw diameter is used at each fast food chain. It may be different at a local watering hole that just installs any old ice machine and buys their straws at Sam's, but I would think a company the size of McDonald's has spent money studying their ice. If you think I'm off my rocker here, pay attention to the drink dispenser next time you go to a drive-thru. It's become more common for these dispensers to have a button that drops the perfect amount of ice for the size cup you ordered, then another button that dispenses the correct amount of liquid to fill the remaining space in the cup. What I want to know is whether the shapes and amounts are standard to all McDonald's or if the manager at each location can tweek the setting to accomodate the shape of their ice and the tastes of the local market. I'm sure that at the very least, McDonald's dictates how many fluid ounces should be put in each cup, regardless of ice shape. I don't know if Sonic uses similar dispensers because I can't see what they're doing from my car, but I do know that every Sonic I've ever been too has the same kind of ice. And while I love their ice, I think that if you took two cups of the same size and filled one with Sonic ice and one with McDonald's ice, then measured how much space was left for liquid, the Sonic cup will hold less drink. I'm basing this on the fact that Sonic's ice is so tiny, it's liable to settle closer together and leave less room in-between cubes for liquid. Think about that next time you order "Route 44".

Monday, January 26, 2009

The Best American Sports Championship

As you probably know, this Sunday isn't just any Sunday....it's Superbowl Sunday. This is a big deal. You don't have to care anything about football or sports to know that this is a big deal. You can tell it's a big deal because there are displays at Walmart reminding you to get your themed cups and napkins. There are glossy sales ads devoted entirely to must-have foods to eat while you watch the big game. In order to complete your game-watching experience, you've got to have ice-cold drinks, hot wings, cheese dip, and li'l smokies. Didn't you get the memo? What does any of this have to do with football? Nothing. And that's why the NFL has a better championships than any other American sport. They make people who don't even like football want to watch the Super Bowl. How have they managed this feat? Let's take a look at what the Super Bowl has going for it.

Super Bowl Parties
If you only get invited to one party all year long, it's probably on either New Years Eve or Super Bowl Sunday. You don't have to have a favorite team, you just have to like snack food and the company of your friends. Even if you don't have any friends, there is always someone to watch the game with. Whether it's at your church or a bar, somewhere there is a group of people who will cheer or boo along with you. You don't even have to understand the rules of the game. I guarantee someone at the party will be more than happy to explain the rules to you or persuade you what team is more deserving of the title. Why do people go to these parties? Most of them don't really care who wins, they simply want to be included in what has become an American tradition. These parties are now so common and well-attended that Super Bowl Sunday is the second highest food consumption day in the U.S., behind only Thanksgiving. The game itself has managed to become the most watched television broadcast of the year. Which leads me to....

Commercials
If you don't watch the Super Bowl for the game, at least watch it for the commercials. So many people do just that that companies are willing to pay $3 million for 30 seconds of our collective time. And with so much money on the line, companies don't put up some commercial that you've already seen 3 times during re-runs of House. They offer something brand new that will hold your attention and make you remember what it is you're supposed to buy. As a result, some of the funniest, most memorable commercials have debuted during the Super Bowl. If you can't think of one off the top of your head, let me give you a hint....WWAAAAZZZUUUPPP!

Halftime shows
Some of the biggest names in entertainment show up to perform at the halftime show of the Super Bowl. For a few years there, the show was like a who's who of current top 40, but it's gotten more conservative after the 2004 debacle. Still, getting the likes of Paul McCartney or the Rolling Stones to perform is no small feat. This year, we get to grove to the smooth beats of Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band. The Boss may not be the draw he once was, but he'll still hold most of our attention longer than John Madden. And the NFL knows this. A general audience is only going to sit through a minute or two of game commentary before wandering off to get more cheese dip. So instead, the NFL and the network snag some big names, set off tons of fireworks, and try to keep you in your seat until it's time for the next million dollar moment.

It's Easy
Try explaining the BCS to a non-sports fan, and their eyes are going to glaze over in about 4 seconds. The beauty of the Super Bowl is that it doesn't require you to sit through a 7 game series or fill out a bracket of 64 teams you know nothing about. Sure, there are playoffs, but in the end, everything is riding on a single game on a set night. The Super Bowl is the one-night stand of sports championships. No commitment required. You won't even be faulted if you forget the team names a week later. Just go with whoever has the best looking jerseys and enjoy yourself.

So there you have it, the reasons I think more people watch the Super Bowl than the finale of American Idol or the Academy Awards. I realize that some people actually watch it for the game, but the point I'm trying to make is that football fans aren't the target audience of the Super Bowl broadcast. Football fans don't care about Bruce Springsteen, they care about things like the nickel package and whatever it is halfbacks do. The NFL knows that these people will tune in. The viewers they're really trying to get is the people who might be able to tell you that the Steelers are playing the Cardinals, but who might also have a hard time remembering whether these are the Cardinals from Arizona or St. Louis. So for all of you out there who don't care who wins, enjoy the game!

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Tall and pregnant

I went looking for maternity jeans yesterday. Everyone who sees me insists that I'm still so small for being 4 months pregnant, but my jeans beg to differ. Even doing the rubber band trick with the button and covering it all up with a belly band was getting uncomfortable. So I decided to go looking for "mom jeans" while I still had at least one pair that I could leave the house in. I suppose I could have waited a little longer and rolled up there in some sweat pants at the last possible moment, but I'd rather not.

From asking around, I decided to start my search at Motherhood Maternity. They had a lot of different styles to choose from and the lady there was very helpful. The best part was that, except for the stretchy tops, you would never know that the jeans were maternity jeans. The worst part was that they didn't carry any tall sizes. Instead, the sizes did something that has always confounded me. As the overall size got bigger, the legs got longer. I see this all the time, but I don't understand it. Perhaps there is a lineage of people who grow in perfect height/weight proportions, but I did not descend from these people. So I had to start looking elsewhere for maternity jeans.

My next stop was JC Penney's. After making a lap around the clothing department, I finally had to ask where the maternity section was. The girl wasn't surprised that I'd missed it and led me to two rows of clothing wedged between petites and work out clothing. In spite of their lack of volume, they had a pretty good selection of pants. I found a couple of pairs of jeans that fit well except for the length. This put me back at square one, except that I know from experience that JC Penney's web site tends to carry tall sizes. As I found out when I got home, this applies to their maternity clothes as well, so I might be ordering some from there. For the time being, I did find 2 pairs of casual corduroy maternity pants with a huge 2 inch hem in them. They were on clearance, so I got both pairs for under $20 and had my mom let the hem out to make them longer.

After relating the results of my pant quest to couple of recently pregnant friends, I got another tip on where to check for tall sizes, so between there and Penney's, I should be able to find some good jeans. Those I'll be able to wear year round, and once it gets too hot for the corduroys, I can switch to capris or some kind of shorts where tall sizes will be a moot point.

Friday, January 23, 2009

Sonic's condiments

When it comes to fast food menus, Sonic's is more extensive than most. Not only do they have more drink choices than you can shake a stick at, they have burger and chicken sandwiches (which could come on either a bun or Texas toast), foot long hot dogs, corn dogs, chicken fingers, grilled cheese, and wraps. And that's just the main entrees. For a side item, you can get cheese sticks, cheddar poppers, onion rings, tater tots, and of course, fries. On top of all that, they have a breakfast menu available all day (although granted, most of the breakfast items just require swapping out a hamburger patty and lettuce for a sausage patty and egg).

With this many different options, it's not surprising that they offer such a wide range of condiments. Most fast food places are content to stick with ketchup, but not Sonic. They have a condiment for any occasion. The only problem is that they don't seem to be able to pair my order with the appropriate condiment. I think their general tendency is to offer salsa in the morning and ketchup in the afternoon, regardless of what I actually ordered. At any time of day, I generally find a peppermint and a few salt packets in the bottom of my bag. The peppermint is a nice touch, but I, for one, have never taken a bite of fast food and thought to myself, "what this needs is more salt!" Maybe they should stop providing salt entirely and instead toss in a couple of desiccant packets in those foil bags to keep my grilled cheese from getting soggy. Now THAT would be useful.

Yesterday morning, I pulled in to Sonic and ordered a sausage breakfast toaster sandwich, two jr. chili cheese wraps, and a java chiller. When they brought the food out, the girl was very friendly and after reading over the ticket to confirm my order, she asked if I wanted any grape or strawberry jelly. This was a new one on me, and I'm still trying to figure out what part of that meal would have been complimented by jelly. Perhaps it would been best utilized eaten straight from the packet as a desert? I'm not sure. I went to Sonic again this morning, driving through to order two jr. chili cheese wraps. When I got to the window, the lady handed me my order and asked if I wanted salsa. I'm hoping that I misheard her and she actually asked if I wanted "to salsa", which would seem slightly less odd of a proposition. In any case, I turned her down.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The new old lady paper

About 6 months ago, I decided to subscribe to the Sunday paper. Part of my reason for doing this was to get the weekly TV schedule. Now that we don't have Tivo or any kind of digital cable, it's nice to know what shows are coming on when. I realize that I could get this same information online, thereby avoiding inky fingers, but I don't usually need to know what's on TV until I sit down to watch something. By that time I'm sitting down, I don't want to get back up and consult the internet prior to picking a show. My only other option is to flip around channels aimlessly or sit though the painfully slow scrolling on-air guide. After all, if I'm going to waste time watching TV, I want to actually be watching the TV instead of watching channels to try to determine what I should be watching.

The TV schedule that comes in the Sunday paper has remained largely un-changed for years. I know this because my parent's have gotten the Sunday paper for most of my life. I can remember using this weekly TV schedule almost 15 years ago. Apart from a change years ago when they flipped the hours/channels axis, nothing much has changed. It's not as compact as an actual TV Guide magazine, but it's stapled together and can survive a week's worth of handling.

Two weeks ago, everything changed. I was going though my Sunday paper pulling out the important parts (glossy ads, TV schedule, Parade magazine, and funny papers) only to find my TV schedule morphed into something entirely undesirable. Instead of being about the size of a piece of notebook paper folded in half, it's as big as the Parade! To add insult to injury...IT ISN'T EVEN STAPLED TOGETHER!! The lack of staples is the worst of it because I'm used to keeping the schedule turned to the current day. With this new format, if I try to do that, the pages go everywhere! I tried stapling it myself the first week, but it's just not the same.

There are bigger problems in the world than whether or not my TV schedule is formatted to my liking, but since it's one of the main reasons for me subscribing to the paper, it's disappointing. Daniel thinks it's funny that I use the TV schedule at all, referring to it as my "old lady paper". I do actually feel like a crotchety old lady complaining about something so mundane, but apparently I'm not the only one who's annoyed by it. The week after they changed the format, Daniel happened to be looking at the editorial page and showed me two letters with similar complaints. I felt a little validated after that.

Now that my tv schedule is all messed up, and knowing that I can get everything else I want from the paper on the internet, this might be enough to warrant canceling my subscription. The only thing standing in my way is that you can't cancel your subscription online. Anything that can't be done online always takes me twice as long to accomplish because it involves things like writing checks or finding stamps or making phone calls on my lunch hour. If it were a little more convenient to either get my TV schedule or cancel my newspaper subscription, I just would done that instead of writing this blog entry.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Walk It Out in the 60's

Because not EVERY post can be about pregnancy....

Belly Band or Tube Top? Either way, I'm a winner!

Four months into my pregnancy, and I'm finally starting to show! It's more or less obvious depending on what shirt I'm wearing, but my pants can definitely tell. Some of them are refusing to be worn at all. In fact, I wore the same pair of jeans to work all last week because they were the only ones I was remotely comfortable in. When I mentioned this to a friend who just had a baby, she told me about "belly bands". I had never heard of such a thing, so I won't assume that you have either. It's essentially a spandex tube top that's meant to be worn around your waist. It allows you to wear your regular pants unbuttoned, then pull the spandex down over the top so that no one can tell they're not buttoned and they don't tend to fall down. Then you just wear whatever shirt you want and the belly band just looks like a stylish layer.

I tend to be dubious of things like this. Especially things that obviously cost a great deal more to buy than they do to make. But I did find a cheap version at Target, so I'm going to give it a try. It it lets me put off buying maternity jeans for a little longer, it'll be worth it. I figure, at the very worst, I've got a new tube top!

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Pregnancy has a way of complicating things. I mean it's a wonderful, beautiful thing, and the miracle of life, blah blah blah. But there is also the inability to stay up past 9pm or button my pants. And when I started getting a cold a week ago, there was the complication of what I could or couldn't take for it. Now, I'm not one to take medication for the duration of a cold, but I do like to sleep at night, so I checked the reference sheet from my doctor on pregnancy do's and don'ts. According to that, I can take Sudafed and some version of Robitussin. Armed with that knowledge I headed off to the pharmacy.

There is an episode of Everyone Hates Chris where he talks about his mom always buying generic versions of food. When it shows the things she's buying, everything is in a plain white package with black lettering telling you what knock-off item you're about to purchase. I wish my pharmacy had a section like that with just one kind of Sudafed. Instead, I was forced to choose between about 6 different kinds of name brand and generic Sudafeds. Some were just for congestion while others covered the whole spectrum of symptoms. Each one had the same active ingredient for congestion though, and the pain relievers were always Tylenol, so I figured it didn't matter too much which one I picked. But just to be sure, I asked the pharmacist whether the box I had was safe to take during pregnancy. She took a look at it, checked a list somewhere, and directed me to the kind of Sudafed that you have to buy from behind the pharmacy counter. I hadn't even considered this option, and when I got it, I realized that it had an entirely different active ingredient than the other Sudafeds. As it turns out, this other ingredient is what used to be the ingredient of choice for congestion, but now it's the ingredient of choice for making meth. But there is a generic, so I just had to show my driver's license and pay $1.50.

Always curious about things like this, the first thing I did when I got home was google the difference between the new Sudafed and the old Sudafed, especially as it applies to pregnancy. I'm sure it drives doctors and nurses crazy when people start any medical question with "I was reading on the internet...." but I would rather look something up on WebMD than leave a message for my nurse every time some odd question pops in my head. And what I found was that there isn't a consensus on what kind of Sudafed pregnant women. So I just did what I should have done to begin with and called my doctor's office for some clarification. The answer I got was that I shouldn't be taking the one the pharmacist gave me because there was a risk of increased heart rate.

So I'm back at square one and still can't stop coughing. I would have trusted either the nurse or the pharmacist if I'd only been able to get advice from one of them, but when they contradicted each other, I just decided not to take sides. Besides, cold medicine doesn't really help get rid of the cold, it just makes you feel better, right? So I'm just put on my big girl panties and dealt with it. When it comes to colds, I'd rather not medication anyway. When it comes time for an epidural....well, that'll be another story!

Friday, January 2, 2009

I've always heard that during a certain phase of their pregnancy, women have a "glow" about them. It's discussed as though it were a beautiful aura that comes over you as a representation of the sublime miracle of life. Then when I got pregnant, I found out that one of the main causes of this perceived glow is the increased amount of oil that your body is producing. So instead of making me glow, it's making me break out. Yay for pregnancy!